Motherhood…Unprepared

My little girl is growing up. And I don’t like it. They don’t tell you when you enter into the whole parenting “thing” how hard it is to give them those small increments of independence. That they’re someday going to want to do things by themselves. Like riding to the library on their bikes. All alone.

What’s funny is that back when I was a kid, there was no thought otherwise about this stuff. We left the house in the morning and we were expected back before dark. Our moms simply asked where we were going or whose house we’d be at. Then we’d ride our bikes around or go to the pool or go exploring or go fishing or whatever it is that kids do. Nowadays, however, we’re terrified of letting our kids out of our sight. At least I am.

Anyway, Maggie’s been pestering me to allow her to ride her bike to the library by herself. I’ve been putting it off and putting it off. Even my mom said I should let her do it. Well, last week, we all walked to the library together. Or, rather, I pushed Henry in the stroller while Maggie rode her bike & Steven rode his scooter. It went well. Maggie even took off on the way back & made it back about 10 minutes before us. So she had made it through all 8 of her books in 2 days. I didn’t want to go back to the library again so soon, so I took a risk. I let her go. She took my cellphone and I told her she had to call when she got to the library and when she was leaving, so I’d know when to expect her back.

She did it. Of course. I don’t know why I thought otherwise, but I was worried. The best part was how proud she was of herself. She felt so accomplished and independent which was really cool to see. SO cool and independent, in fact, that she did it again the next day. I feel more confident with her having that phone. She told me that she felt a need to hurry at the library because I’d be worried, so I told her that wasn’t necessary. I mean, if anybody bugs her at the library, she just has to be loud or go ask a librarian for help. I trust that she’s safe once she’s in the building. It’s the to & from that worry me. So I know if she’s not home within 10 minutes of her call, I should go find her.

I’m encouraged. And a little sad. It’s hard to let them go, even a little bit.